Today's advice is how to be a courteous passenger. Gas prices have come down, but they are still up there. So anyone willing to drive you is a good friend. Be a good passenger.
Rule number one, don't jack with the radio. If you are too lazy to drive, then don't complain about the music. I was raised driver picks the tunes in the car. If you want to listen to something else, feel free to ask. Just don't hijack the radio. Never change the station or adjust the volume with out asking first. It's rude.
Rule number 2, if driver has to stop for gas to take you somewhere, offer to pitch in. I am not saying pay for the whole tank of gas, but at least pitch in a few dollars. Even if they were going anyway. I have forgotten to do this on occassion & always felt like an idiot after.
Rule number 3, if you are picky about the route that should be taken, give notice. Nothing more annoying than someone who is not an effective navigator. It is totally irritating to be expected to drive somewhere you have never been with someone who has been there before & won't give proper directions. If you don't know exactly how to get somewhere & YOU won't drive, then get the address & map it for the person who is. Those of you who offer up 17 different ways to get where you are going en route are just as annoying. Pick a way & let us try that. Unless we are trying to get around traffic, you are only confusing the situation.
Rule number 4, if you know a person's driving is unnerving to you. Drive yourself. I am a horrible driver. My buddy Brett has fully admitted he will never ride with me again. that's cool with me. he never said a word while he was in the car. Too busy praying. I am much better now that I drive the Short Round. But still not the best driver ever. Hubby never wants to drive, but ALWAYS complains about my driving when we go places together. Makes me want to drive into on coming traffic. FYI the only time we were nearly seriously injured in a vehicle, HE was driving. I'm just sayin'.
Rule number 5, don't aggravate the driver. Again, this person is doing you a favor, be considerate.
Now I am not suggesting the driver gets to be all Driver-zilla & is the only one with any consideration. I am saying anyone driving in traffic, so you don't have to deserves a little kindness.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Letting The Changes Happen
People always want you to be the way you were in their memory. Regardless of whether that is a faulty memory, or just an idealized version of yourself. I have something to say to that:
Forget you.
Myspace & Facebook have given us an incredible opportunity to mix all of our friends. People who knew you in high school, your mother, my mothers-in-law, my teenage cousin, people who knew me in my drinking days, bad girl moments, church going-choir singing times, all on the same page, reading my same updates.
You would be amazed at the folks who expect you to think like you did the last time they saw you. Yikes! How horrible would that be? To never mature, to never make a change of anykind. Some accused me of turning my back on them to live a new lifestyle. I was forgetting who I was.
Nope. I am remembering who I am NOW. The daughter I am raising NOW. The incredible man I am married to NOW. I have made some bad choices, some amazing choices, some abysmal choices. I have a hard time regretting any of it, because I am living such an amazing life now.
People change. Don't let someone else's conception of who you used to be color who you are now. Don't be offended that they have those misconceptions. I have run into people I haven't seen in 20 years who have a better handle on who I am now than people I talked to just last week. Take the comments with some class. Make a joke of it.
When people were astonished I had a child & was married now. I made a joke of it. I tell them I had to stop the bar scene because Short Round kept getting kicked out for being an angry drunk. People sometimes have a hard time processing changes. They only have what they remember to go by.
You decide who you are. Your actions show the world how you have changed. Let them catch up in their own time.
Forget you.
Myspace & Facebook have given us an incredible opportunity to mix all of our friends. People who knew you in high school, your mother, my mothers-in-law, my teenage cousin, people who knew me in my drinking days, bad girl moments, church going-choir singing times, all on the same page, reading my same updates.
You would be amazed at the folks who expect you to think like you did the last time they saw you. Yikes! How horrible would that be? To never mature, to never make a change of anykind. Some accused me of turning my back on them to live a new lifestyle. I was forgetting who I was.
Nope. I am remembering who I am NOW. The daughter I am raising NOW. The incredible man I am married to NOW. I have made some bad choices, some amazing choices, some abysmal choices. I have a hard time regretting any of it, because I am living such an amazing life now.
People change. Don't let someone else's conception of who you used to be color who you are now. Don't be offended that they have those misconceptions. I have run into people I haven't seen in 20 years who have a better handle on who I am now than people I talked to just last week. Take the comments with some class. Make a joke of it.
When people were astonished I had a child & was married now. I made a joke of it. I tell them I had to stop the bar scene because Short Round kept getting kicked out for being an angry drunk. People sometimes have a hard time processing changes. They only have what they remember to go by.
You decide who you are. Your actions show the world how you have changed. Let them catch up in their own time.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
What's In a Name?
Would a rose by any other name not smell as sweet? Probably not, but if her name is Rose & you call her Lily, You are mostly likely getting the stink eye. That alone, not a big thing. I forget names all the time. Luckily, I live in the south. I can call nearly anyone Sugar, Honey or Darling & get away with it.
My true complaint is the attitude of people when you correct them on your name. Don't act like I am asking you to develop a cure for cancer when I correct you for calling me by a name that is not mine. Maybe you call someone Rob & their name is Ron. Close enough some say.
Um. No. You might be off by a letter, but you are still wrong.
Having taken nearly 2 years to stop accidently calling my friends Brett & Brent by each other's names, I know it's not done on purpose. Thank goodness I could blame it on the alcohol & the incredibly loud bar we all drank at. Again, it's the attitude of the person being corrected that gets to me.
Laughing it off & doing better next time, totally acceptable. Getting offended that you were politely corrected, asinine. It is rude to call someone by the wrong name. It's disrepectful. It is saying to them that they do not matter enough to you to try & learn their name.
I have some exceptions, those of you with 42 nicknames. You don't get to be offended that someone can't remember your name. You have too many & it's confusing. Families that use the same first letter in more than 5 kids' names. I will never keep that straight. I panicked when hubby told me all his brothers & sister had names beginning with letter J. One of them goes by his middle name, one is a female & that makes the the other 2 are easy to remember.
If you are like me & forget often here are some tricks to keep a name in your head.
1. Repeat it often during conversation. Some say at least 5 times. if they ask, tell them the truth, you are trying to make sure you don't forget the name.
2. Ask a QUIET friend. No need to ask someone who is going to shout it out so the whole neighborhood knows you forgot that one guy's name again.
3. Write it down. I was at the park, met some cool moms & their kids. I wrote down all the names when I got home. So I don't have to worry about forgetting who goes with who.
4. Tie it to a song. There are a few bajillion songs out there with names for titles. Ex- you meet Dan- You think Daniel's Song by Elton John. Might suck to have a song you hate in your head, but might keep the name in your mind.
5. Tie it to Tv or Movie. The episode of Friends when Rachel is dating Joshua. She keeps saying Josh- ua. Joshua. I will never forget a Joshua, because I can hear Jennifer Anniston saying Josh-ua in my head when ever I see them.
6. Make sneaky introductions. When you have someone who's name escapes you, have one of your friends introduce themselves. You get their name again & they don't know you forgot. You can always play it off that you thought they had already met.
Again, no one expects to have their name emblazoned in your memory, but it is a sting to the pride to have your name forgotten. Be cool when you are correcting someone & hopefully they will be cool back.
My true complaint is the attitude of people when you correct them on your name. Don't act like I am asking you to develop a cure for cancer when I correct you for calling me by a name that is not mine. Maybe you call someone Rob & their name is Ron. Close enough some say.
Um. No. You might be off by a letter, but you are still wrong.
Having taken nearly 2 years to stop accidently calling my friends Brett & Brent by each other's names, I know it's not done on purpose. Thank goodness I could blame it on the alcohol & the incredibly loud bar we all drank at. Again, it's the attitude of the person being corrected that gets to me.
Laughing it off & doing better next time, totally acceptable. Getting offended that you were politely corrected, asinine. It is rude to call someone by the wrong name. It's disrepectful. It is saying to them that they do not matter enough to you to try & learn their name.
I have some exceptions, those of you with 42 nicknames. You don't get to be offended that someone can't remember your name. You have too many & it's confusing. Families that use the same first letter in more than 5 kids' names. I will never keep that straight. I panicked when hubby told me all his brothers & sister had names beginning with letter J. One of them goes by his middle name, one is a female & that makes the the other 2 are easy to remember.
If you are like me & forget often here are some tricks to keep a name in your head.
1. Repeat it often during conversation. Some say at least 5 times. if they ask, tell them the truth, you are trying to make sure you don't forget the name.
2. Ask a QUIET friend. No need to ask someone who is going to shout it out so the whole neighborhood knows you forgot that one guy's name again.
3. Write it down. I was at the park, met some cool moms & their kids. I wrote down all the names when I got home. So I don't have to worry about forgetting who goes with who.
4. Tie it to a song. There are a few bajillion songs out there with names for titles. Ex- you meet Dan- You think Daniel's Song by Elton John. Might suck to have a song you hate in your head, but might keep the name in your mind.
5. Tie it to Tv or Movie. The episode of Friends when Rachel is dating Joshua. She keeps saying Josh- ua. Joshua. I will never forget a Joshua, because I can hear Jennifer Anniston saying Josh-ua in my head when ever I see them.
6. Make sneaky introductions. When you have someone who's name escapes you, have one of your friends introduce themselves. You get their name again & they don't know you forgot. You can always play it off that you thought they had already met.
Again, no one expects to have their name emblazoned in your memory, but it is a sting to the pride to have your name forgotten. Be cool when you are correcting someone & hopefully they will be cool back.
What It's All About
This is a new blog for me & my various non-blogging counter parts to dish out advice. We have no qualifications whatsoever to tell you how to live your life. Heck I had to look up whatsoever to see exactly how to type it up properly. Clearly punctuation & spelling won't be large topics here. These are our opinions. Mostly mine, since I am writing it all up. Feel free to send messages to the facebook & twitter pages if you have topics to bring up.
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